Friday, December 26, 2014

The Eely lady, by the Fool

I have to admit that I'm a total narcissist. I love it when people write songs about Aegthil. They are always hilarious, and I sit at my computer going chuckle, chuckle, chuckle, and my kids ask me What's funny, Dad? and I tell them, and they say Oh your stupid Lotro band, how lame is THAT? Jeez, Dad, get a life, you are such a loser and if you didn't play so many computer games you wouldn't be so fat and ugly... etc. So I whack them and they shut up. No, I'm joking, I don't whack them, that would be against the law in New Zealand, but I think about it.

Anyway, Eely lady, AKA Eilye, wrote a wonderful song about Aegthil. Well, I mean, she filked a song.  Based on the tune of There is a House in New Orleans, she redid the lyrics. I heard it for the first time last BBB concert and I laughed so much I could hardly type.

I was so touched that I wrote a song for Eilye in return. It's called Eely Lady, and you can find the mp3 here, the abc here.

Verse 1
 Eely lady swims the waters
 Through the darkness of the night
 Looking out for prey unwary
 So to feed her appetite

 Eely lady's old and wily
 Long of tooth and sharp of claw
 But those wrinkles are well hidden
 'Neath the smoothest skin you saw

 Eely lady is the greatest
 She's a sexy CEC
 She's got implants worth the money
 Most expensive surgery

 Eely lady play your heart out
 Get that crowd upon its feet
 Those cosmetics must be paid for
 'Cause it ain't cheap to look so sweet

Verse 2
 Eely lady ain't so fussy
 Hobbit, Dwarf or Elven Lad
 Anything that's young and tasty
 Is a tidbit to be had

 Entice them in with surface sweetness
 Little do the poor lads know
 That sharpened teeth, an evil mind,
 And many many long years lurk below


Verse 3
 Gentlemen, please listen carefully
 Best to learn this lesson well
 If you see the Eely lady
 Turn around and run like hell

*Chorus x2*

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