Monday, February 27, 2012

The Treasure Hunt Performance

I'm sure this one will go down into BBB history, but for all the wrong reasons.

I have no idea why the piper man decided to waste good music on a bunch of dirty smelly hairy dorf miners, but decide he did, so off we all toddled to the Treasure Hunt. We played our little hearts out, while the event ended and began and ended and began, and all to no avail. Not even berries were found.

The futile merry-go-round of life was never so aptly demonstrated.

And to make it worse, some silly bobbit lady was there, by name of Goldentwinklestar or something. Goldystarrypoo.  Goldyshinytwinkle. Whatever. And, oh boy, did she ever take a shine to Bandoras, that short fat bobbit of no talent and even worse fashion sense. They were practically making out on stage, hot and bobbit heavy. Really nasty stuff.

The rest of BBB tried to control their dry heaves.

And now I hear that Bandoras actually has an official fan club! This is outrageous. It is a sad, sad day in the annals of Eriador musical history when a short fattie gets his own fan club, while talent maestros such as myself do not. *sigh*.

Still, I guess they're only bobbits. I think I'd prefer a Hot Elven Chick Fan Club. The HEC Fan Club. That could work.

Aegthil and the HECs. I can see it.


  1. That's not how you spell HAG, Aegthil.

    1. Hungry Aegthil's Goblins. Oh yeah.


  2. All this nonsense seems to have passed me by somehow. What is a "Bandoras" anyway? About time BBB got back to core values; music, alcohol and mayhem. Since when did BBB ever care about popularity anyway? Harumph.

  3. My dear bald friend,

    Please, there's no need to be jealous. While I recognize that jealousy is a natural reaction coming from one so follicaly and hygienically challenged as yourself, do not despair. I'm certain that somewhere out there - WAY out there is a blind, angry, mute, deaf, dwarf somewhere who has no sense of smell. They'll be in your fan club.

    Bandoras Fortunefoot